Today I had the pleasure of having a big chunk of time to read while at the park. And read a book that makes me smile and laugh at times! The kids were all happily playing almost non-stop the entire time. I could scarcely believe my luck and didn't stop and try to figure out why things were working out so well. I just enjoyed my book and the cool October breeze that reminded me why living here is so wonderful (after a long summer's amnesia).
At one point, a couple Jr. High age boys came over on their bikes. As you may have suspected from my description of these boys, I started hearing some crude things come flying out their mouths. These words gave me flashbacks of my teen years which I wasn't in the mood for. That, and more importantly with the kids close by, I saw fit to give them an adult looking gaze of "I'm watching you." These kids hung out awhile longer with better, normal conversation, and then possibly feeling my cold shoulder, finally rode away. "Triumph" I thought. I watched my sweet kids for a minute and thought again about how obnoxious teenagers can be. No sooner did I think "my kids will never be like THAT", did I have a sinking feeling.
I had thought those words before- before I had kids at all. When I would see dirty kids at various places. Or screaming kids. Or kids with snot coming out their nose. Of course I thought what every pre-mom thinks. I will NOT have kids like that. They'll be well-kept and well-behaved- and cute of course. And all mothers know how this story ends. Even after great efforts to turn out such kids, it just can't always be the case. I've seen the look of childless women snubbing their noses at me a couple times. I've had moments when I've wanted to stand apart from my kid(s) and look on, wondering where their mom is and why isn't she in control of them with everyone else.
So, does this mean my little kids pretending to make cookies out of sand at the park are doomed to become obnoxious teens? The thought was a sad and somewhat shocking one. Hopefully I can keep the crude part out of it? I hope as those years approach I'll feel more ready for them than I do now. :)
2 comments:
Sigh. I know what you mean. I mean, I think I was a pretty good teenager, but I hope my kids aren't even like I was. I guess we'll just navigate that time when it happens and probably make the mistakes just like we are now. Hopefully our kids (and us!) will come through having learned and grown from their experiences.
I'm still one of those pre-moms. Gross! Not my kids!
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