A few days back as I was fixing Holly's hair, she started asking me about fairies. Her face lit up and her smiley little eyes shone at me in the mirror as she asked me where I thought they lived and other particulars about their lives. I smiled back at my sweet girl who's on the verge of turning 8. Eight has always been a big number in my mind. It's kind of like a first "coming-of-age" on the road of life. In about a week and a half she'll get a baptized and receive the Holy Ghost. I tear up a bit every time I think about that special day- what it will mean to her and our family.
When I was eight years old not only did I get baptized, I also learned the truth about Santa, the Tooth Fairy, and how babies are created. I've always felt I was ready to learn those things- that it was a good age for them. So for my kids, I think they must be ready to learn those truths too. I felt torn as I watched her excitement about something magical she believed in. But something not real. A real magical thing is about to happen and I want her to feel the difference.
"Well where do you think the Tooth Fairy lives mom?"
Pause
"Mom?"
I smoothed her long brown hair and said "Well....mom's the Tooth Fairy..."
"Mo-om, c'mon..."
When I didn't admit to teasing her, I saw her face start to accept it. Then her eyes started to water up and my heart broke. Regret washed over me. She said "Does Emma know?" I said "Yep- and Eli." And then to try and make her feel like she was part of the "big kids club" I said, "This isn't something we talk about to other people right? Sadie hasn't lost a single tooth yet and we want it to be fun for her too right?" She nodded at that and seemed recovered. As I finished up her hair I said "Do you wish I didn't tell you?" She said no, which made me feel better.
Monday we'll have a FHE about Baptism and Confirmation and what they mean. And I'm going to talk with her about real magic- like: Prayer and Heavenly Father's love for us, Repentance and the Atonement of our Savior. And try to keep them at her level.
And I'm really hoping that she'll start to figure out Santa on her own because I'm pretty sure I won't be helping her along with her "coming-of-age" year again.
3 comments:
This made me tear up too. Poor girl. You never forget those moments.
Aww so bittersweet. I remember being about 8 when I found out about Santa in a similar way. My mom asked me who I thought he was and I guessed Grandpa, but then she told me the truth. It was ok because the rule in our house was that if you didn't believe in Santa then you didn't get presents. :) She didn't want us being cynical about it or giving it away to the little girls. I think you handled it great.
I'm already fielding probing questions and I'm not sure Weston has much longer as a believer. We'll see.
Aww, I kind of wish I could capture the magic of still believing in fairies. I've been thinking about the magic of childhood more since I have one now (a child). I loved your comments about the real magic of the gospel. Sweet post.
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